Thursday, 6 January 2011

Back on track.

Thank you for all my lovely comments, they really helped me to become binge free today...and I feel so much better for it.

But, I weighed in at 55.5kg today, after my disgusting binge days. I'm paying now...

So, I'm back on track, and I have just eaten dinner, so guess what I get to do after writing this post? Yeahh, purge I hate my life.

My mum cooked tonight, to give me a break, and she made cheese and potato pie (for those who don't know, it consists of mashed potato (with shit loads of butter), cheese (yes, cheddar, ugh), tomatoes, streaky bacon (hi, I'm the size of a whale from all this fat), onions and grated cheese on top. I think that it is a heart attack.
I cannot imagine how many calories are in it, but I'm assuming I had a 400g portion, and I ate like just over a half (and I certainly didn't eat the melted cheese on top, or the bacon). So, I hope I haven't eaten over 500 calories. Even so, it won't be that hard to purge, because it's soft and whatever (yeah, this is a bit graphic).

At least all the christmas food has gone now, well theres shortbread left, but that tastes a bit like blue cheese (I really don't know why), so I won;t be eating that!! And, there's Terry's Chocolate Orange too, but I don't like that either, so it's all good.

Also, a 2.6 mile walk today, plus walking around the town where I go to college, and I went to the study centre thousands of times, so that I had to walk up the three flights of stairs (I wanted as much exercise as possible!!)
And, I'll do my before-sleep crunches as well, and some lunges too.

But, I probs won't be posting much this coming week, because I'm supposed to be revising for my exams (Weds and Thurs).

I need to be 45kg, and now it's even further away than it was before. I hope I'm not actually 55.5kg, I hope it's just that weird bloaty thing I get when I have eaten loads, that goes after like a week of not eating much, and I return to my normal weight. I really do hope. I feel so fat, like my stomach makes me look as though I have kwashiokor. Ugly. Disgusting.

Anyway, time for me to go do my thing now...undisturbed because my parents don't want to bother me whilst I'm revising!!! Score :)

Stay strong x

1 comment:

  1. Omg i hate it wen i;m made cheese and potato pie, i am a savoury girl and i love the flavour (not the calories) So it's very difficult to maintain some kind of self-control. (Luckily i don't get it very often) It sounds as though you went well on not eating too much of it anyway. I want to be 45 kilos aswell, and i am 53.3 (was 52.5 but binged and went to 53.9 - gahhhh) So we are similar weights, how tall are you?