Wednesday, 1 December 2010

Bad day...again!!

Oh my God, I just ate some pork scratchings..I don't know why. I looked at their calorie content just, and they're 680cals per 100g. What the sh*t was I thinking???

I'm certainly not as strong as I used to be.

I'm pretty sure my mom has realised that something is wrong again. There's not mom...not nearly enough yet!!

So, I text my boyfriend like half an hour ago, and I know he is home by now, but he hasn't text me back. I am actually really upset right now, for multiple reasons!

I am going shopping tomorrow, so this will be fun, as per!! In Primark too, I always find that I am a size bigger in Primark, so this could all end in tears!! Let's be honest, it will :(

I weighed myself before eating that crap, I was 52kg, so I have lost a kg, but it was before I ate, so I don't like to think it counts. And, I have only done 35mins walking today, because I got a lift home from college.

I'm really pissed off that I ate, because I'm spending soooo much money on fags and various other appetite suppressants, and I am completely ignoring them. I'm trying not to purge as well, I think I kind of deserve it though, and will have to. So, this should be fun.

And, I don't think I'll be able to see my boyfriend this weekend:
a) because he isn't texting me back
b) I'm so fat, I don't want to embarrass myself
c) it's snowing quite badly, so he might not be able to drive to me

FML...I really wish that I was skinnier.

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