Monday, 27 December 2010

Christmas Holiday


Hope you all had a nice christmas.

I'm not going to lie to you, I had a serious binge on christmas day, but then restricted seriously on boxing day and today, and plan to for a very long time.

I weighed in at 56kg this morning, I have put on 5kg since the last time I weighed in - which was christmas eve! I am ridiculously disgusted at myself, as you can imagine. So, it's walks, and runs, and restriction for me now..

Also, my boyfriend has been texting me again a lot more but, with the snow, we can't see each other. So, I'll make myself thin, thin, THIN for the next time I do see him.

I don't know why I like him, everyone keeps telling me that he's an idiot, and he's no good...but I just do!

I seem to have lost the desire for food after Christmas. I felt so shit when I weighed myself yesterday. This is good, but I know that once I start eating, I won't stop! So, no more weekend binges. And, less diet coke, because it makes me crave. Just water, and fruit shoot H2O's.

I want to lose 2 inches off my legs by next January 30th. I need to...

Also, my purging came back into full swing on christmas eve.
I must have purged 6 different times, I just kept eating and purging. I don't know why. I felt like I needed to.
But, I don't want to purge anymore, so I'm just going to not eat...that's what I did before. I was never really that much of a purger before, I don't know why I am now. Strange.

Anyway, time to go shopping...x

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