Tuesday, 10 January 2012

This is actually horrible.

So, I looked in my wardrobe the other day to see what I had to wear, and then I saw about 4 cups that I had previously used to purge into. To my own surprise, there was one with sick in there that had been there for months. I don't want to go into detail or anything, but you can imagine how that smelt and stuff - and I didn't realise because I have a divided wardrobe, and this is for my posher clothes, that I seldom wear. It was so hideous, and I had to find a way to clean them whilst my parents were in the house as well. I've honestly never seen or smelt anything worse.
I realised that I have a problem and vow never to purge again, because that was just awful.

Anyway, I think I'm pregnant, but there's no way of knowing because I don't have periods. I missed a couple of pills from purging, so who knows. I'll take a test tomorrow, I think. As much as I would love a baby, at the moment I cannot afford to put on any weight - or starve my baby to death whilst it is inside of me.

As you can tell I'm in a shitty mood. So, I'm going to stop putting everyone down now, and go off until I feel better. Sorry! Hope everyone is ok.

1 comment:

  1. Wow, babe. That's a bad way to a wonderful realisation. I'm so proud of you making that decision.
    Good luck with the test. I would love a baby as well, but I still need to study and such.
    Hope you're feeling better! <3